Ceud Mile Failte!

14Jun/060

So, the Ministry of Silly Statistics and General Bullshit (AKA visitscotland) are very worried that Scottish Tourism will suffer due to a lack of English visitors this Summer. They reckon that 50p in every tourist £ is spent by the English in Scotland. How the fuck do they know that? No doubt they spent a huge amount of that money trying to find out!

Apparently the English are all dreadfully offended that we Scots are not wholeheartedly behind their lads in Germany! One company has even cancelled a convention booking in Carnoustie because our First Minister made it clear that he would not be supporting England during the World Cup. How dare he!

I know the man is a dick but on this occasion he got it just right (for a change). Why should we support this overblown bunch of “celebrities”? Why shouldn’t we support Trinidad & Tobago? They’ve got 6 players who make their living in Scottish Football so I think it’s a natural choice to support them.

So if you are one of the highly offended Engerlish tourists I would advise you to go somewhere nice like France for your hols. They love you there as much as we do. Oh yes, and while you’re at it FUCKING GROW UP!

And if you’re not…
…Ceud Mile Failte!

…A Hundred Thousand Welcomes!

(And I know I promised not to mention football — I lied)